Double A Experience

life have been filled with ups and downs lately

you might have noticed it if you had followed me on twitter

especially recently i have been using twitter as my punching bag

a platform to pour my heart out

i am in love

and i am in love

its like the world is beautiful again

and its all bouquets of roses

thats where you are wrong and it is no where near even a stalk of rose

i got myself trapped in this whirlpool of emotions

even when i know the end result is that i will get sucked into this feeling

and eventually die due to suffocation and not being able to escape

i insist in staying drowned and not safe myself

coz i know every second spend together is precious

i really wonder why i am putting myself through this

when the escape route is still within reach

may God show me the right thing to do soon 

before i crash and burn and never snap out of this fantasy


i am very picky when it comes to friendship

but i am very sensitive when it comes to the type of relationship i have in a friendship

no matter you’re a work colleague or a friend with benefits

no matter in which one of my life you exist in

i will treat you like you are the last friend i have

i will try as hard as possible to gain the trust

and work my way up to an awesome friendship

my friends are literally my family and relatives

as in reality, it seemed as if i haven’t had any relatives at all

so this is the beginning of my own little family tree

with many roots.

PS. TO MY DEAR FRIEND NABIL KAPADIA, HAPPY R.O.D TO YOU

may you succeed in all your future endeavors

and till we meet again

i leave you with this chorus  lyrics in malay.

this is what i am trying my best to feel

but its hurting me to feel this way.

“Tiada lagi yang ku harapkanTiada lagi yang ku impikanBiar aku sendiri tanpa diri muTiada lagi kata cintamuTakkan lagi ku bersama muBiar ku simpan semuaKenangan ku bersamamu”

#NSlife #personalblog